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The Hobbit - As Retold by the Retard!

Competition!

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Vote Fascist for another Five Glorious Years.

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When Christians Attack!

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Rock X - Bring the Weirdness

 

The Daily Retard is Proud to present to the first three episode's of our brand new Science Fiction Serial - Rock X.

“I got my black shirt on
I got my black gloves on
I got my ski mask on
This shit's been too long
I got my twelve gauge sawed off
I got my headlights turned off
I'm bout to bust some shots off
I'm bout to dust some cops off!”

Body Count - Cop Killer

 

“Shiny, shiny, shiny boots of leather
Whiplash girl child in the dark
Comes in bells, your servant, don't forsake him
Strike, dear mistress, and cure his heart

Downy sins of streetlight fancies
Chase the costumes she shall wear
Ermine furs adorn the imperious
Severin, Severin awaits you there“

The Velvet Underground - Venus in Furs

 

“Exit light - Enter night - Take my hand
off to never never land
something's wrong, shut the light
heavy thoughts tonight and they aren't of snow white
dreams of war, dreams of liars
dreams of dragon's fire and of things that will bite
sleep with one eye open gripping your pillow tight”
Metallica - Enter Sandman

Episode 1 - Welcome back online

You've just woken up to the grim reality that your life is not the one you think it is. Shame that. You are, in fact, an adventurer across time, space, dimensions and reality.

Episode 2  - Y

We bring in Max, our narrator, and Kaz, the sexy and, albeit slight homicidal ex-porn star turned professional adventurer that make up the elements of your crew.

 

Episode 3 - Kaz in Leather

This is how Kaz started out her interdimensional adventures, by going nuts on a porn set and ending up in a toilet in Inverness

Episode 4 - Due online 26th April. E-mail us for more details.

 

 

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Last modified: March 22, 2003